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A very special friend was recently confiding in me that she had not been intentional around creating her company; she had let several several months go by and was now staring into the dragons mouth of her financial obligations without a knight in shining armor; not that she was looking for one. She knew that she could easily take care of her financial concerns. It was the though of having to put her dreams on hold to deal with the dragon that was upsetting.

So what to do?

As if I should know. I really wish I was the oracle of Gales, and this time – as you’ll see – I clearly was not.

In my manly, and practical “wisdom” I advised her that she had to deal with the reality of her circumstance in order to move forward. Therefore, she might have to face the “karma” of her prior inaction and get a temporary job. She was not very happy, yet she acknowledged that this might be the only way.

Lucky for her, I’m not the only oracle she consults.

She called me the other day, all pumped up and bursting with enthusiasm, to tell me that she was focusing 100% on her business. She had abandoned any search for a traditional, albeit temporary job, as a solution to her current financial dilemma.

This revelation, from her “other” oracle – I know I’m not the only one – got her to see that giving anything less than 100% to her dreams was a sell-out, and would not only delay or derail her dreams but would make her miserable.

It’s funny when you know something is right for you how you feel inside, and it was clear that my friend was bursting with joy. Deep inside she already knew following her bliss was the only course for her, and was only looking to have it validated by someone she trusts. Not hearing it from me, she turned to someone else to get that validation. This was all she needed to really cast off from all that she knows and sail into the uncharted waters of her future.

I was and am very happy for her, and especially that someone else was there to focus her on what her own soul was telling her. She also shared a particularly fitting quote which I’ll share with you here:

“One does not discover new lands without consenting to lose sight of the shore for a very long time.”

Adre Gide

Through this experience with my friend I learned a valuable lesson for myself:

It is a gift to have a dream, and there is no greater expression of love for yourself and life than to follow that dream.

Hmmmm! That may be quotable. 😉

And a lesson for you: Always have your back up oracle. Always get a second opinion when it comes to medicine and matters for the soul.


It’s not often you have an encounter with another human being that moves you. I mean really moves you. Someone had that effect on me last night, and the interesting thing is that this person really has no idea the effect she had on me.

I had a brush with purity. Almost the divine. It’s amazing that to a casual observer what occurred would not have been noticed, and moreover might even have been trivialized had I tried to explain it. Almost like, “Wow, you’re being a little dramatic.” But I can’t help what I felt.

Quite simply, a very attractive woman whom I had just met said something to me that touched my soul. She looked into my eyes and said, “Don’t look so hard, you will find it.”

And the message received was, it will come, I am deserving, it is waiting, and I’m blocking it by looking so hard.

In law of attraction speak, I’m too attached to the outcome. Deepak Chopra referred to this as the law of detachment. He explains it something like don’t be too attached to what you want. Believe that you are deserving of it, focus on it while at the same time being OK with not, or in fact never having it.

Interesting mind frame when you think of it. To be focused on something. To know that you are deserving of it and will have it, while at the same time being at peace with not receiving it. Some people call this the practice of allowing.

Well tonight, at a bar with a friend of mine, this very attractive bartender shared what she saw in both of us. She spent most of the time with my friend who is a George Clooney look-alike so you can’t blame her, but when she did share what she saw in me, it spoke to me at the deep level of my soul.

“Don’t look so hard, you will find it.”

I can’t remember what else she said because those initial words struck such a chord that I had stopped listening. The cynic in me is quick to point out that what she said could apply to anyone and the cynic is right.

And this does no justice to the emotional impact of what she said. How much of her impact on me had to do with how attractive she was or the Glenlivit in my hand I’ll never know, but I know what I felt.

I felt that she looked into my soul. In a brief, superficial even trivial encounter she saw me and saw my pain and her words and her being were like a healing balm. (Forgive the drama.)

“Don’t look so hard, you will find it.”

Those words resonated with me at such a deep level that I can’t express. I just feel blessed to have been in the presence of an angel, and I thank her for sharing what she saw.

I am challenged by what relevance this has for your life. Perhaps it’s just to be open to what the Universe or God is trying to tell you. We are all getting signals, even being communicated with by a higher power all of the time. The trick is to look for it, to listen and be open.

Last night it was easy because her beauty got my attention. I did not expect that she had a message for me that would penetrate so deeply. It was like a parent kissing a child and saying, “Don’t worry, it’s going to be all right.”

Had a very interesting conversation with a good friend of mine this morning and it was quite an eye-opener for me.   Here was a guy who in my eyes is one of the most highly trained beings on the planet telling me that he realizes how much he is not present, how he is constantly distracted by what’s going on in his head.  This was really surprising to me as this guy occurs as supremely in the moment whenever we are together, and he himself reports that he is able to fully listen to another person and re-create what’s going on for that person.

So that left me with a disconnect with an association I realize that I had made, and that association was that listening, really listening, is a natural manifestation of someone who has developed the ability to really be present.   Present all of the time.   My friend’s revelation may not necessarily be a refutation of this hypothesis, but it does open up for me that this game (as big or small as you choose to define it) has many, perhaps infinite, levels of mastery.  My friend may have developed a high level of skill in listening to others, maybe of really being able to be present in those moments,  AND he is not yet able to bring that level of focus to other areas of his life.

So having mastered your serve on one surface doesn’t mean that you have on another.

So I was at the club of a good friend of mine last night. If you live in New York and like live music its called Rose. Anyway my friend Carlo asked me to help him diffuse a situation with a young man who was apparently causing some concern from Carlo for his place and his patrons.

So there I was in the basement of this club talking to a very young man, more likely a boy, who I can best describe as proud, rebellious, and oh yeah … cool. Being attached to all three, he was not about to be intimidated by the threat of the police. He was there to stay.

Now the interesting thing for me is that I could not understand this young man. Apart from his repeated entreaties for my understanding his case and how he felt, “You feel me?”, I really struggled to understand what exactly he was angry about.

In his speak I just wasn’t “feelin” him. Except that I got that this young man felt that he was treated unjustly and he wasn’t going to take it. I also saw that what he was angry about had nothing to do with what occurred that night in Carlo’s club. This young man was walking around with anger. He has a conversation/a story about the world being unfair and out to get him and last night he simply found the latest expression of his story.

And he talked non-stop. He spoke the language of his peers and his community and boy did I feel square. I tried my best to “get down with homey” and “dig his deal” but man I was just not hipping with the hop.

This reminded me about Senator Obama’s speech. Here was a very angry young man, that at a very fundamental level just needed to let it out and be heard. It just happened he chose the wrong place and time to do that, and he was also completely blinded by his anger. So angry that he couldn’t listen.

For me this was interesting in that you can’t have communication when no-one is listening. And how do you get someone to listen. Now it would be simple to say that first people must be calm and not in a mood of anger to listen. But being in the right mood is not sufficient. Listening is a practice of being. It is not a skill of tips and techniques that allow you to truly get what’s going on for another person.

Now it really helps when both sides are speaking the same language even if it’s street or Caribbean dialect. So if there is a community that you want to be in communication with you’ve got two practices: first, practice speaking their language, and second practice being compassionate in your listening.

“You hear what I’m sayin’ bro? You feel me?”

By the way cops came and “escorted” the young man out of the club.